Tuesday, February 18, 2014

A short History of 26 Billion Kms

Today I turned 28. Strictly speaking I took 28 rounds around the Sun (I don't see any better standard). If I were to account for lunar years, there seems no astronomical significance for 12 lunar months - 12 lunar months seems to be an arbitrarily chosen value which is close enough to estimate the  cycle of solar influenced seasons. But, I am too small to underestimate the relevance of lunar months, there is a tremendous influence of lunar gravity in a localized environment.



How many more revolutions I wish to take? It is not always the same. There were instances in my life when I felt that I am not moving at all, and when I wished that I could stop moving any further. Even though, while I am in dead still, I am moving at a speed of 107,300 km/h. That is as much as moving around the equator of earth around 2.5 times in an hour. There were instances in my life when I felt that I want to live for ever. But, the truth is sooner or later in astronomical time, the sun, the earth will be a story of past. And there is problem when I say 'past', because who know when the 'past' will be a past - when the time itself will stop.




Anyway, living in this world for 28 years or 26 Billion Kms around the sun (apart from a billion or so Kms while I was in my mother's womb) my mind is getting ripe to accept death. I was like a young Siddhartha in my early years, I was afraid of death and used to feel depressed on every birthday. I used to cry in ecstasy as the midnight approached (though I was born around 5 am). I never used to feel happy for my birthday, I felt I am getting an year closer to death. I used to think 'how I will face death', it used to give me a nightmare. Today I slept well, had a sound sleep from 11 pm to 6 am. I feel like I am no more afraid of death. It is not because of the drama created by my friends and family on each of my birthdays (perhaps the concept of birthday itself has evolved as a cure to make people forget that it is indeed a sad day), it is because of realization. If you had closely observed the agony of a deer while it is caught by a lion, you might have observed that even though the deer resists in the beginning, later on when it realizes that there is no escape, it simply accepts death, calmly and with all submission. I sometimes feel that it even enjoys the pleasure of getting killed when it is about to die. I am like that deer, in fact we all are.









2 comments:

  1. The image consisting in calculating years in a lifetime as kilometers "revved" by the Earth around the Sun is great. That's truly a way to fuse into the cosmos. And of course we are fused.

    Stefano Libey
    stefanolibey.com

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thank you stefano. Your comment in fact made my post complete.

    ReplyDelete

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